what should i do....?

Have been feeling very depressed and moody these few days...

Sometimes it is really not good to find out things which my beloved partner is hiding from me... but the curiosity just can't help... it's just fated that somethings need to come into light, and let me be wary about...

dunno what to do...

forgive...forget...forgive... forget...

if were to pursue this matter...this is going to be the 2nd time in this year, and the no. 5th time for these past 2 years...

is it worth to pursue? From the previous past 4th pursuing experiences, it was always seems to be me at fault... and i have to forgive whatever misdeeds and lies that he has been doing and telling me...

he knew i am hurt... but why still want to do it again and again...

Lies lies lies... and covering ups....

Asking for forgiveness...yes... i can forgive... but I won't be able to FORGET....
So can't he just remember not to do it and hurt me again????

I am getting more emotional lately... in no time... i should be getting into depression...

whenever i think of it... i want to cry....

i need to see a counsellor or psychiatrist...

I need guidance and advice to help and guide me...

to teach me how to carry on my life........